13 Families Announce Plan To Sell Trillions In Ancestral Treasures For BlackRock Bitcoin IBIT ETF

Guest Author

Jan 9, 2024 — 2 min read

Full Headline: 13 Families Announce Plan To Sell Trillions In Ancestral Gold, Cuneiform Tablets, And All Books From The Great Library of Alexandria For BlackRock Bitcoin IBIT ETF

Through sources in the military industrial complex and the fashion industry we have confirmed all 13 families willcustody their new acquisition with Coinbase (COIN).

After thousands of generations of mastery of global finance, obscuring their wealth and dominating global superpowers for time immemorial; it appears a new chapter is beginning for the mysterious rulers of earth. After attending the Bitcoin Conference in Miami in 2023 it appears there is one question still lingering in the air surrounding other custodians like Swan and the legacy of the 13 and Coinbase.

Cory from Swan was quoted as saying, "We understand the need to profit off generational global domination and we don't provide tax advice. We encourage self custody but some of our clients prefer Fortress; it reminds them of the old days of Hungarian and Romanian castles and the games of war."

It remains to be seen if any of the grand deceivers of central banking and centuries long domination of continents make the leap from Coinbase to Swan any time soon pending the Blackrock ETF.

Terrence from Swan is assuring customers that should one more of the royal bloodline families decide to "get on the mission" there will be a chance for promotion and a chance to visit the infamous site of where Adi Da first met Lord Rockefeller in the glory days of the cult. Sources close to the Twitter Space where this was discussed have not confirmed the validity of these bold and far reaching statements but tensions are rising: some professionals are calling this disorder Bilderberg syndrome.

The affliction causes arguments about which ETF will be best for fees; and gambling problems related to betting on each delay or approval as they come and go. The CDC is standing by to flatten the curve of the Bitcoin price if needed post-halving. Hopefully Coinbase, the 13 families and Swan get their houses in order.

This article was submitted by a guest author. To submit news tips, contact the Bugle via email/socials.

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