On the beat. Smoking Marlboro Reds and cranking out the best news articles you ever read. Left the media industry in disgust. Building out Greaser's Gulch.
This article was written based off a news tip from a reader Swan has been making the best of the Bitcoin bear market. There are 3 imperatives of a bear market which are fighting, stacking and building. Swan has mostly been fighting, but now they are looking at doing some
The San Francisco evangelical community has been turned completely upside down after a sudden disappearance in the homeless population, prior to Xi Jinping's visit to crumbling city. Biden and Newsom's attempt to clean up for visiting company had the unintended impact of convincing many churchgoers that
Parents around the country are growing concerned as more and more schools are failing to teach their kids basic skills such as reading and writing. Instead, these schools are hyper focused on teaching children communist ideology. One 5th grade teacher in San Francisco brought in a tattoo artist to give
Hillary Clinton memes will now be designated as weapons of mass destruction, and will be regulated by the ATF. The regulatory agency cites the potential for memes to threaten the foundations of our democracy by spreading dangerous misinformation that will be rebunked 6 months after an initial debunk. The main
Moody's credit rating agency, famous for failing to properly rate mortgage backed securities in 2008, has now officially downgraded the US federal government from stable to negative. The agency is reported to be having a spat with Janet Yellen and the treasury department after Yellen refused to give
Cointelegraph has reported that Gary Gensler has announced that the SEC would be approving an Ethereum spot ETF before they consider approving a Bitcoin spot ETF. The announcement has caused chaos in the cryptocurrency world as many people had been betting on a Bitcoin ETF first. The SEC has cited
A new emerging market has been developing as Bitcoiners are looking for new ways to stack Bitcoin. Many have already sold all their worldly possessions in order to stack, and are running out of ways to acquire more corn. At a loss of what to do, many are looking to
Canada is full of a bunch of losers who hate truck drivers. There's only a couple of cool ones there, but one of the cool ones is a hoser with a blonde streak through his hair. Canada is governed by a communist loser, and hasn't had
Fake News
Both Republicans and Democrats in both houses of congress have passed a bill extending term limits beyond death. Part of the bill also includes a $30k a year stipend for memory care. Politicians that are deceased, but still wish to remain in office, have the opportunity to have their bodies
Better Opinion
In a strange move, American politicians have begun endorsing Bitcoin as a good way to launder money in order to avoid taxes. It appears they are understanding the extent of their overreach and see Bitcoin as a way to average citizens to protect themselves from their policies. This week, Janet
Fake News
In a controversial, yet based move, Merriam-Webster has quietly updated the definition of taxation to be, "When a government extorts their citizens out of money with threats of violence." Prior to the update, they had some generic definition along the lines of, "The act of collecting taxes.
Governments around the world are currently terrified as their populations continue to grow more and more dissatisfied. The UK government has become much more active in prosecuting hate speech and has gone as far as to label the popular book and movie, V for Vendetta, "Hate Art." The