Donald Trump Sells Suit He Was Shot In To David Bailey For 700 BTC, Who Claims It Has Mystical Powers
The Messianic leader of the new Trumpianity religion sweeping the nation has sold the suit he was shot in to David Bailey for 700 BTC, valued at roughly 47 million USDT. Bailey reports that he plans to wear the suit to the conference, despite it being far too large for him, due to it's mystical powers. Bailey reports that while wearing it, he had his wife attempt to shoot him, and the suits mystical powers curved the bullets around him, almost as if Bailey was Neo in the Matrix. Bailey also claims that the suit gives him tremendous amounts of energy, which will allow him to travel the world at an unprecedented rate to organize and hold conferences.
Earlier this week, Bailey's twitter account was suspended for unknown reasons. Bailey was currently out of the house, but when he returned home and put on Trump's suit jacket, his account was reinstated in minutes. This clear example of a miracle brought on by the suit. Bailey has reportedly been contacted by that Vatican who wants to inspect it, and possibly consider Donald Trump for Saint status, pending his potential future martyrdom. Strangely enough, in DJT surviving a CIA assassination attempt has placed him in a strange position in the eyes of the Vatican who usually on saints individuals who have died for attempting to spread their faith.
Bailey is reportedly working with the Taproot Wizards to tokenize the suit, following Scotty Pippin's example of tokenizing items that individuals don't own, but still providing them ownership in their minds by issuing a token associated with an item. He claims that owning the token would act as a sort of indulgence for noncomliant Bitcoiners who have not paid their taxes, or followed the rules.
When criticized on Twitter by Pledditor for the enormous purchase price as well as the "shitcoining," Bailey responded with, "This suit has mystical powers that are priceless. I would've paid as much Bitcoin as was humanly possible. 700 BTC is a walk in the Park and is only slightly larger than the amount Greg Foss pissed away on his poor investment strategy."
